Ivory Tower
Uploaded on authorSTREAM by shiloh325
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Just give me a few minutes..................
A tired,old dog wandered into the yard. I could tell by his collar and well fed belly he was someones pet. He followed me into the house, down the hall, and then fell asleep ine a corner.
An hour later he went to the door and I let him out.
The next day he was back...resumed his position in the corner and slept for an hour. Then he got up and left. This same routine continued for several days.
Finally, overcome with curiosity, I pinned a note to his collar: "Every day your dog comes to my house, sleeps for an hour and then leaves".
The next day my new friend arrived with a different note pinned to his collar: "He lives in a home with ten children - he is trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?"
Friday, September 19, 2008
A born loser...................
A little guy is sitting at the bar just staring at his drink for half an hour when this big trouble-makingbiker steps next to him, grabs his drink, gulps it down inone swig and then turns to the guy with a menacing stare asif to say, 'What'cha gonna do about it
?'The poor little guy starts crying.'Come on man I was just giving you a hardtime,' the biker says. 'I didn't thinkyou'd CRY. I can't stand to see a man crying.
"This is the worst day of my life," saysthe little guy between sobs. "I can't do anythingright. I overslept and was late to an important meeting, somy boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car was stolen and I don't have any insurance. Ileft my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my wife inbed with the gardener and my dog bit me. So I came to thisbar trying to work up the courage to put an end to my life,and then you show up and drink the damn poison."
Big Band Era.........
Monday, September 15, 2008
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Iguazu Falls - Argentina
Taller than Niagara Falls, twice as wide with 275 cascades spread in a horsehoe shape over nearly two miles of the Iguazu River, Iguazú Falls are the result of a volcanic eruption which left yet another large crack in the earth. During the rainy season of November - March, the rate of flow of water going over the falls may reach 450,000 cubic feet (12,750 cubic m) per second.
These matter of fact details do nothing to describe the grandeur of the falls, the tremendous amount of water (an average of 553 cubic feet per second) thundering down 269 feet, the tropical location and the sheer beauty that led Eleanor Roosevelt to say Poor Niagara. Four times the width of Niagara Falls, Iguazu Falls are divided by various islands into separate waterfalls. One of the best known is Devil's Throat, or Gargantua del Diablo with its perpetual spray high over the falls. Other notable falls are the San Martin, Bossetti, and Bernabe Mendez.
Uploaded on authorSTREAM by shiloh325
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
The old phone...............
Then I discovered that somewhere inside the wonderful device lived an amazing person. Her name was "Information Please" and there was nothing she did not know. Information Please could supply anyone's number and the correct time.
My personal experience with the genie-in-a-bottle came one day while my mother was visiting a neighbour. Amusing myself at the tool bench in the basement, I whacked my finger with a hammer, the pain was terrible, but there seemed no point in crying because there was no one home to give sympathy
I walked around the house sucking my throbbing finger, finally arriving at the stairway. The telephone! Quickly, I ran for the footstool in the parlour and dragged it to the landing Climbing up, I unhooked the receiver in the parlour and held it to my ear. "Information, please" I said into the mouthpiece just above my head. A click or two and a small clear voice spoke into my ear.
"Information. "
"I hurt my finger..." I wailed into the phone, the tears came readily enough now that I had an audience.
"Isn't your mother home?" came the question. "Nobody's home but me," I blubbered. "Are you bleeding?" the voice asked. "No," I replied. "I hit my finger with the hammer and it hurts." "Can you open the icebox?" she asked. I said I could. "Then chip off a little bit of ice and hold it to your finger," said the voice.
After that, I called "Information Please" for everything. I asked her for help with my geography, and she told me where Philadelphia was. She helped me with my math. She told me my pet chipmunk that I had caught in the park just the day before, would eat fruit and nuts.
Then, there was the time Petey, our pet canary, died. I called, Information Please," and told her the sad story. She listened, and then said things grown-ups say to soothe a child. But I was not consoled. I asked her, "Why is it that birds should sing so beautifu lly and bring joy to all families, only to end up as a heap of feathers on the bottom of a cage?"
She must have sensed my deep concern, for she said quietly, " Wayne always remember that there are other worlds to sing in.">> Somehow I felt better. Another day I was on the telephone, "Information Please." "Information, " said in the now familiar voice. "How do I spell fix?" I asked.
All this took place in a small town in the Pacific Northwest . When I was nine years old, we moved across the country to Boston . I missed my friend very much. "Information Please" belonged in that old wooden box back home and I somehow never thought of trying the shiny new phone that=2 0sat on the table in the hall. As I grew into my teens, the memories of those childhood conversations never really left me.
Often, in moments of doubt and perplexity I would recall the serene sense of security I had then. I appreciated now how patient, understanding, and kind she was to have spent her time on a little boy.
A few years later, on my way west to college, my plane put down in Seattle . I had about a half-hour or so between planes. I spent 15 minutes or so on the phone with my sister, who lived there now. Then without thinking what I was doing, I dialed my hometown Operator and said, "Information Please." Miraculously, I heard the small, clear voice I knew so well. "Information. " I hadn't planned this, but I heard myself saying, "Could you please tell me how to spell fix?"
There was a long pause. Then came the soft spoken answer, "I guess your finger must have healed by now." I laughed, "So it's really you," I said "I wonder if you have any idea how much you meant to me during that time?" I wonder," she said, "if you know how much your call meant to me. I never had any children and I u sed to look forward to your calls."
I told her how often I had thought of her over the years and I asked if I could call her again when I came back to visit my sister. "Please do", she said. "Just ask for Sally."
Three months later I was back in Seattle . A different voice answered "Information. " I asked for Sally. "Are you a friend?" she said. "Yes, a very old friend," I answered. "I'm sorry to have to tell you this," she said. "Sally had been working part-time the last few years because she was sick. She died five weeks ago."
Before I could hang up she said, "Wait a minute, did you say your name was Wayne ?" "Yes." I answered. "Well, Sally left a message for you. She wrote it down in case you called. Let me read it to you." The note said, "Tell him there are other worlds to sing in. He'll know what I mean." I thanked her and hung up. I knew what Sally meant.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
When the time comes.............
A sick man turned to his doctor as he was preparing to Leave the examination room and said, 'Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side.'
Very quietly, the doctor said, 'I don't know.'
'You don't know? You, a Christian man, Do not know what is on the other side?'
The doctor was holding the handle of the door; On the other side came a sound of scratching and whining, And as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room And leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.
Turning to the patient, the doctor said, 'Did you notice my dog? He's never been in this room before. He didn't know what was inside. He knew nothing except that his master was here, And when the door opened, he sprang in without fear.
I know little of what is on the other side of death, But I do know one thing... I know my Master is there and that is enough.'
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Monday, August 18, 2008
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Monday, August 11, 2008
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Monday, August 4, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Friday, August 1, 2008
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
And now the time has come...........................
Randy Pausch, famed for his life-affirming message, passes at 47
PITTSBURGH - Randy Pausch, a computer science professor whose "last lecture" about facing terminal cancer became an Internet sensation and a best-selling book, has died. He was 47.
Pausch died early Friday at his home in Virginia, said Anne Watzman, a spokeswoman for Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh where he worked. Pausch and his family moved there last fall to be closer to his wife's relatives.
Pausch was diagnosed with incurable pancreatic cancer in September 2006. His popular last lecture in September 2007 garnered international attention and was viewed by millions on the Internet.
Pausch died early Friday at his home in Virginia, said Anne Watzman, a spokeswoman for Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh where he worked. Pausch and his family moved there last fall to be closer to his wife's relatives.
Pausch was diagnosed with incurable pancreatic cancer in September 2006. His popular last lecture in September 2007 garnered international attention and was viewed by millions on the Internet.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
The buffalo theory.................
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells . But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Friday, July 4, 2008
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Friday, June 27, 2008
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Monday, June 23, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Monday, June 16, 2008
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
Tim Russert....truly a sad loss for America
A true shining star in the mess that is Washington and the media
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Where did the White Man go wrong...................
Indian Chief "Two Eagles" was asked by a white U.S. government official, "You have observed
the white man for 90 years. You've seen his wars and his technological advances. You've seen
his progress, and the damage he's done."
The Chief nodded in agreement.
The official continued, "Considering all these events, in your opinion, where did the white man go wrong?" The Chief stared at the government official for over a minute and then calmly replied:
"When white man find land, Indians running it, no taxes, no debt, plenty buffalo, plenty beaver, clean water.
Women did all the work, Medicine man free. Indian man spend all day hunting and fishing; all night having sex.' Then the chief leaned back and smiled "Only white man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that."
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Get out of jail free..........................
Starting in 1941, increasing numbers of British airmen found themselves as the involuntary guests of the Third Reich, and the Crown was casting about for ways and means to facilitate their escape. Now obviously, one of the most helpful aids to that end is a useful, accurate map, one showing not only where-stuff- was, but also showing the locations of "safe houses" a POW on-the-lam could go to for food and shelter. Paper maps had real drawbacks: they make a lot of noise when you open and fold them, they wear-out rapidly, and if they get wet, they turn into mush.
Someone i n the MI-5 branch (one hopes it was the youthful incarnation of "Q"!), got the idea of printing escape maps on silk. It's durable, can be scrunched-up into tiny wads and unfolded as many times as needed, and makes no noise whatever. At that time, there was only one manufacturer in Great Britain that had perfected the technology of printing on silk, and that was John Waddington, Ltd. When approached by HM Government, the firm was only too happy to do its bit for the war effort. By pure coincidence, Waddington's was also the U.K. licensee for the popular American board game, Monopoly. As it happened, " games and pastimes" was a category of item qualified for insertion into "CARE packages" dispatched by the International Red Cross to prisoners of war of all belligerents.
Under strictest secrecy, in a securely guarded and inaccessible old workshop on the grounds of Waddington's, a group of sworn-to-secrecy employees began mass-producing escape maps, keyed to each region of Germany or Italy where Allied POW camps were located (Red Cross packages were delivered to prisoners in accordance with that same regional system). When processed, these maps could be folded into such tiny dots that they would actually fit inside a Monopoly playing piece. As long as they were at it, the clever workmen at Waddington's also managed to add:
A playing token containing a small magnetic compass A two-part metal file that could easily be screwed together Useful amounts of genuine high-denomination German, Italian and French currency hidden within the piles of Monopoly money! British and American air crews were advised, before taking off on their first missions, on how to identify a "rigged" Monopoly set - by means of a tiny red dot, one cleverly rigged to look like an ordinary printing glitch, located in the corner of the Free Parking square! Of the estimated 35,000 Allied POWS who successfully escaped, more than a few were aided in their flight by the rigged Monopoly sets. Everyone who did so was sworn to secrecy indefinitely - HM Government might want to use this highly successful ruse in another, future war.
The story wasn't declassified until 2007, when the surviving craftsmen from Waddington's, as well as the firm itself, were finally honored in a public ceremony. At any rate, it's always nice when you can play that "Get Out of Jail Free" card!
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